You often wonder if you are even capable of the forgiveness you seek.
You know you are going to have to deal with it one way or another; like a brain swollen so large it’s about to burst out of its skull. Bones fracturing. Heat rising. Intensity growing.
How do you make the swelling go down? How do you arrive back at neutral?
Asking for forgiveness means seeking it for yourself. Acknowledging the suffering you have caused. The kind of pain that’s so deeply embarrassing you feel your heart might stop. A pervasive pain – shame.
The only way to rid this fear is to expose it. Say sorry. Mean it. It won’t feel so big anymore.
Then, stop. Close your eyes. Find yourself. Got it? Can you hear your own voice and see your own face?
Say you’re sorry. Mean it.
Acceptance. Accept your own apology.
Release. Let it go. It’s okay.
You’re fallible. Just like every other thing in existence. This is what it is to experience Life.